I met her assisting on a shoot. She needed a ride home so the photographer asked me. She didn’t acknowledge my existence much as I was merely an assistant, yeah that kinda girl. So the car ride was pretty quiet, she stayed on her phone. I should have left it at that when I dropped her off. Months later I was wanting to shoot female musicians. I asked her to shoot because she was the keyboardist of a rad metal band called Winds of Plague. I knew about all her gross shitty stretched out tattoos and cheap style, but hey, I’m a good photographer. So she just jumped at the opportunity for free images when she saw that I was a creative photographer. I didn’t know she was bringing a “producer” with her and I thought it really strange. He came with his glowing white translucent teeth. He just stood there telling her to suck in her stomach and stuff. He began discussing her style, her clothing and her makeup with me, almost as if she wasn’t there. I thought it was kinda sick for a man to criticize blatantly like that a woman’s style, she seemed used to it. I should have never ever seen these people again I knew something was off. Why would a grown man be following her around trying to “develop” her. They kept saying that. Both of them kept referring to her as a brand as if she was already some pop star. They took it real fucking serious. So I shot her at my place.
This is what she looked like. You wouldn’t know she looked like this unless you knew her because she deleted every post off social media that existed before she met me. And when I called her out on that she deleted most of what I shot, leaving only the identity that I somehow unwillingly conjured. I could never dream this person would violate my being so intricately.
The first shoot with her, the most regrettable shoot of my life:
A picture of me coming over to an air bb to shoot her for free that her “producer” would rent for her to bang him in bc she told me he allegedly lived with a girlfriend or ex girlfriend, bear with me this gets dicey:
A picture of her today, hm, looks different. reminds me of someone:
No I’m not the only one with choppy vibrant hair in this world. So, this would really fucking slide. Unless you knew the details.
Over the course of quite a while they became full blown in constant contact with me. She would text me 24/7. I’m a lonely person. I began to believe she was my friend and I felt sorry for her. Her producer was scary and controlling. He would intentionally book studio dates if he knew the guy she had a crush on had an event or a show. He even told me several times he quit the project when I was amidst creating a music video for them that I had spent at least a month on my life on. I was paid 1 thousand dollars. I was working on it non stop. Actually, if anyone cares, this producer convinced her to quit Winds of Plague because he was controlling and jealous and a guy she liked had something to do with working with the band. He told her it was bad for her image. He was constantly expressing disgust in her style. And constantly telling her to work out and watch her weight and suck it in. He was telling her that she is about an 8 but if she changes her style and dress she can maybe be a 10. He was disgusted by her style and her friends. One of which who was heavily into plastic surgery. She would get a lot of face injections when she could barely pay rent and that really pissed her “producer” off. They made ALL of this my business as they put me RIGHT smack dab in the middle of it. Once her roommate was suicidal. It was her roommates birthday and they were going out. Her producer made it SUCH a big deal he kept calling me WHEN I HAD NOTHING TO DO WITH IT trying to manipulate me to tell her not to go out because if they go have drinks her roommate may commit suicide. What the hell. He just did not want her going out for drinks with the girls.
After several shoots with her, the producer, Khris, kept telling me over and over I was now responsible for her image and style she was to have. Seemed pretty fucking weird. They roped me into doing soooo much work on the music video, I conceptualized every bit of it. I’d have meetings with them where I would say ideas and she would basically just sit there and shake her head yes. I sent them this whole video treatment I came up with. This treatment was incredible important to me because I had not yet directed a music video and every element of the set design, concepts, everything, I even coached her movements, chose makeup, styling influence, all of it. So I had the meeting with them over the music video and mostly all she gave to me is “I like Britney Spears. I like Marylin Manson.” Well Manson is brilliant. You can’t contrive that. So I worked really fucking hard on this treatment because I knew I was getting paid complete dogshit, way less than minimum wage, so I thought I would at least put my soul into it. Here is what I sent them. And this is fucked up because it would then dictate her entire being. I had no idea anyone would ever change themselves that much based on what I created. I honestly do not want to shoot music videos anymore. I fear it. I didn’t know the intellectual property violation that would happen to me. As you see, this was shot in 2016. It is 2019. I have said nothing publicly about her and him until now. I’m not one to call out someone that paid me to do something. But to this day she is still replicating the video ideas I came up with frame for frame. Concept for concept. It fucks me up. I don’t have a lot. I don’t have money. All I have worked for my entire life is my art and my style. Take anything from me but absolutely do not fuck with that. If you want every secret to her “brand” it’s right here in this treatment. And it’s in the music video. I thought of who she “is” basically and it creeps me the FUCK out. From handwriting, to school girl imagery, to 90s ‘grunge’ fashion because I’m a grunge musician and now she has “coined the term pop grunge”, her makeup, her hair cut, I did it all. EXCEPT her shitty fucking music hahahhahahha god it fucking sucks and it has nothing to do with grunge. She sucked a lot of that out of kris’ dick. So there’s that.
So, meanwhile we are shopping for video stuff and she is buying at a swap meet a used vacuum cleaner which I found disgusting but not as disgusting as the fact that she was talking about how she in no way had attraction to Khris. I was uncomfortable and said something along the lines of ‘well then you probably shouldn’t have slept with him.” And she said “no, I had to or else he wouldn’t have developed me as an artist this far.” And that was fucked up. That was the first time I every saw in person that trite Hollywood cliche of women fucking men to get places. I felt bad for her. I had grown to love the image she had crafted texting me all day. But I should have known that she was stroking me the way she was him. Later she would suck as much info out of him, not use him anymore. Same with me. She was just strokinnnggg out the ideas. Because she had none. All she ever knew was how to replicate. It was sad. Really sad. Interacting with them killed a part of my innocence. I didn’t care that they would just pop adderall all the time. I just didn’t know I was getting SO used. But the using didn’t stop when my contact with her stopped. It carried on for years.
Okay now we’re getting to the good part here is the music video. Conceptualized, directed, edited by me. I mean it even goes to the extent of coaching her jerky movements, to me sending her a video of me dancing on a chair. It goes super deep. Super far. I made a fucking mistake because this constantly haunts me. It would be completely fine if she stopped. But I waited years for her to stop biting me. Didn’t happen. So now I come clean.
So I got paid far below minimum wage to make this. And I got royally fucked. And then she texts me asking to borrow my camera because she wants to shoot a live video of this song. She doesn’t want to pay me and my free shoots had been trickling downward because they became all consuming at one point I felt like a full time unpaid employee. I said no. No you cannot borrow my camera. So the live video borrowed a TON of my concepts. Let me tell you in case you do not know. AN IMAGE MAKER HOLDS COPYRIGHT for concepts in the images whether or not someone else paid for the concepts to be executed UNLESS CONTRACTUALLY STATED OTHERWISE. According to the law, she is NOT to replicate my concepts. But she doesn’t see it that way. Once I saw this live video I was livid. I said you cannot use my character. In high school I adapted this stick figure character with one big eye and one little one. I painted it and hung it on my wall and told my little sister that it’s her. It was funny. I also then used it it college for my first business card logo. I then repainted it on a large oil painting. I then used that painting as part of the set design in her video. She took it upon Herself to take that character and put it in her live video, as well as the green tear makeup concept I used for her video, and of course the cellophane. The reason this intellectual property copyright law is important to image makers is so people don’t go adapting our concepts POORLY JUST LIKE THIS on an iPhone. She has no idea the significance of the character I created, nor the right to execute it this poorly. Hahhahha this looks so fucking stupid.
My character in her video I’ve been making since 16:
Her trying to replicate:
This got me really fucking mad. One of the last times I was around Khris we were all talking about stuff and I was showing them something on my computer. I had just gotten a haircut and normally I do little jagged pixie bangs and then I stick my ears out. He told me I look like a cute little elf in front of her. Next thing I know she cuts little pixie bangs bleaches her hair. Colors it bright. Sticks her ear out and posts “elfie”. Ok between that psychotic shit and all the other shit and this live video desecrating my character. I had it. I blew up on them and told them to leave me the fuck alone. They threatened to sue me for defamation if I say anything about them. That is so funny because I’m not an idiot. You can only sue for defamation if someone is spreading lies about you. I have every single fucked up text conversation and email from them. And I can prove how much she stole from me and I can sue her. I can talk all damn day long about the truth. I have chosen not to until now because I only wanted her to stop. I figured if I kept ignoring her she would start stealing from someone else and leave me alone. She hasn’t stopped stealing though. All I have to say is come at me bitch. You won’t win. I am right. I am telling the truth. You’re a thief. You’re fake. Your face is fake. Your body can be bought. Your ideas are not your own. You have violated me intricately. She said every idea in that video belongs to her now because it is branded on her. That isn’t the way intellectual property works doll. I recently had mean shit to say on her youtube channel and she offered to remove the video I directed from the internet at an attempt at silencing me. I told her that isn’t enough. Stop replicating it. Now for some A / B comparisons.
Movements I taught her in my video:
Her video after that same shit, even matches my white on white sike scene perfectly, not that big of a deal right just kinda annoying:
I’m obsessed with school girl imagery so now that’s her whole thing. Here is a screen shot from my video:
A video she made after:
I’m also into chemistry I fucking love it. Screen shots from my video:
Her video after:
I have an obsession with old outdated electronics so here is my concept about old painted phones from the video I did:
A video she did after with an old painted phone:
okay okay that wasn’t close enough, she had to use the concept again in her LATEST video. This time shot for shot.
cellophane shots from my video:
Now it’s cellophane in all the shots years later and every damn week her hair gets closer to my cut and color:
“Alana rip the piece of paper out the book then bite it and spit it out”-me directing her during our shoot:
Her video later, another shot for shot concept replication:
Honestly , I can keep going all day and night. I’ve had this all pent up. I’ve never said it because I thought it would go away. But she won’t stop. So there you have it. Watch my video then all of hers after if you’re curious. I’m not threatened, she does poor execution. Also the concepts hold no meaning to her. They are things I developed over the course of a lifetime. I am just beyond violated. And sick of it. So many of these things could be let slide. But in the details it’s very twisted. It has left me shunning video gigs for years. Don’t be this fucking guy. I mean the video directly after she made one with me copied NONE of my concepts. But it was fucking horrible [they all are after I left bc they are regurgitated] but that one really sucked, so I think she just went back to what I did. I can’t believe some people want so badly just to be looked at with nothing to say. So they take and take and take from others. And will give their bodies for fame. It’s disgusting to see young women pumping their faces full of chemicals fucking guys for songs. But that’s this world huh.